For Young Ed and all other Minnasodans OT

[Don Coatney]

Minnesota became the 32nd state on May 11, 1858 and was originally settled by a lost tribe of Norwegians seeking refuge from the searing heat of Wisconsin 's winters.

Minnesota gets it's name from the Sioux Indian word "mah-nee-soo-tah," meaning, "No, really... They eat fish soaked in lye."

The state song of Minnesota is "Someday the Vikings will... Aw, never mind."

The Mall of America in Bloomington , Minnesota covers 9.5 million square feet and has enough space to hold 185,000 idiot teenagers yapping away on cell phones.

Madison, Minnesota is known as "the lutefisk capital of the world." Avoid this city at all costs.

"The Mary Tyler Moore Show" was set in Minneapolis , Minnesota , and was Mary's first real acting job since leaving the "Dick van Dyke Show. The show about a single woman's struggle to find happiness in the big city was originally titled "Life Without Dick," but that was changed for some reason.

Downtown Minneapolis has an enclosed skyway system covering 52 blocks, allowing people to live, work, eat, and sleep without ever going outside. The only downside to this is that a Norwegian occasionally turns up missing.

Cartoonist Charles M. Shultz was born in Minneapolis , Minnesota and grew up in St. Paul. He was the only artist to accurately depict the perfectly circular heads of Minnesota natives.

The Hormel Company of Austin , Minnesota produces

6 million cans of Spam a year, even though no one actually eats it. Spam is a prized food in Japan & Hawaii--Spam sushi!!

Minnesota license plates are blue & white and contain the phrase "Blizzards on the 4th of July - you get used to it."

Frank C. Mars, founder of the Mars Candy Co. Was born in Newport, Minnesota . His 3 Musketeers candy bar originally contained three bars in one wrapper, each filled with a different flavor of nougat -chocolate, Spam and lutefisk.

Tonka trucks continue to be manufactured in Minnetonka, Minnesota, despite the thousands of GI Joe dolls killed by them annually in rollover accidents. No airbags, no seat belts. These things are deathtraps, I tell ya!

Author Laura Ingalls Wilder was raised at Walnut Grove, Minnesota, and was famous for writing the "Little House" series of books, as well as inventing the "Spam diet" which consists of looking at a plate of Spam until you lose your appetite. Much like the "lutefisk diet"

The snowmobile was invented in Roseau , Minnesota so as to allow families a means of attending 4th of July picnics

Minnesotans are almost indistinguishable from Wisconsinites. The only way to tell them apart is to ask if they voted for Mondale in '84.

Cold is a relative thing ya know....

At 65 degrees, Arizonans turn on the heat. People in Minnesota plant gardens.

At 60, Californians shiver uncontrollably. People in Minnesota sunbathe.

At 50, Italian & English cars won't start. People in Minnesota drive with the windows down..

At 40, Georgians don coats, thermal underwear, gloves, wool hats. People in Minnesota throw on a flannel shirt.

At 35, New York landlords finally turn up the heat. People in Minnesota have the last cookout before it gets cold.

At 20, People in Miami all die. Minnesotans close their windows.

At 0, Californians fly away to Mexico . People in Minnesota get out their winter coats.

At 10 below zero, Hollywood disintegrates. The Girl Scouts in Minnesota are selling cookies door to door.

At 20 below, Washington DC runs out of hot air. (Ya think? Nah.). People in Minnesota let their dogs sleep indoors.

At 30 below, Santa Claus abandons the North Pole. Minnesotans get upset because they can't start the snowmobile.

At 40 below, ALL atomic motion stops. People in Minnesota start saying..."Cold enough for ya, he?"

At 50 below, hell freezes over. Minnesota public schools will open 2 hours late

[Dan Hiebert]

Good stuff! Kinda like Michigan - only more Viking stock in Minnesota. I remember when I was in Jr. High in south Texas, some cousins from somewhere in Minnesota came to visit. It was a typical south Texas blizzard - all of 50 degrees out, and good heavens, we could see our breath Us locals were all bundled up, they were outside in their swimsuits washing their car!

[Eneto-55]

Don - too funny! Sounds like you used to live there? (I spent 4 winters just west of Minneapolis in the mid to late 70's (Bible college).) I came from Oklahoma, and let me tell you, 40 below in Minnesota some how doesn't feel as cold as 10 below in western Oklahoma. But you're right - I remember the "natives" would go jogging in shorts when it got up to 45 or 50.

Neto

Edited November 25, 2011 by Eneto-55
punctuation

[Plymouthy Adams]

wife went to college in Superior Wi...just across the lake from Duluth..she said its very cold there..I will take her word for it...I will stay somewhat is a more southern clime

[Jerry Roberts]

wife went to college in Superior Wi...just across the lake from Duluth..she said its very cold there..I will take her word for it...I will stay somewhat is a more southern clime

I was born and raised in Superior . Moved to California 30 + years ago because of the weather . They have lots of bars in Superior .

[Dennis_MN]

I was born and raised in Superior . Moved to California 30 + years ago because of the weather . They have lots of bars in Superior .

I lived in South Gate, California back when it was Southern California

I never was as cold as I was there because the house wasn't insulated and it had a gas heater in the hallway. I'll take Minnesota any day because our houses are built for cold weather and you can predict how to dress in the morning.

(South Gate is now in northern Mexico according to my nephew)

[daddyo23]

Thanks for the chuckle, Don. I hate to say it but a good portion of what you said is true.....

[greg g]

Jeff Foxworthy's take on the state of the State of Minnesota

If you feel proud that your state makes the national News 96 nights each year, because International Falls is the coldest spot in the nation, you might live in Minnesota.

If your local Dairy Queen is closed January and February, you might live in Minnesota.

If someone in a store offers you assistance, and they don't work there, you might live in Minnesota.

If your dad's suntan stops at a line curving around the middle of his forehead, you might live in Minnesota.

If you have worn shorts and a parka at the same time, you might live in Minnesota.

If your town has an equal number of bars and churches, you might live in Minnesota.

If you think that ketchup is a little too spicy, you might live in Minnesota.

If vacation means going up North past Virginia for the weekend, you might live in Minnesota.

If you know how to say Wayzata, Mahtomedia, Edina, Shakopee, Winton and Ely, you might live in Minnesota.

If you measure distance in hours, you might live in Minnesota.

If you know several people who have hit a deer more than once, you might live in Minnesota.

If you often switch from heat to A/C in the same day and back again, you might live in Minnesota.

If you see people wearing hunting clothes at special events, you might live in Minnesota.

If you can drive 65 mph through 2 feet of snow during a raging blizzard, without flinching, you might live in Minnesota.

If you install security lights on your house and garage and leave both unlocked, you might live in Minnesota.

If you think of the major food groups as beer, fish and venison, you might live in Minnesota.

[Niel Hoback]

Ole and Lena got married. On their honeymoon trip they were nearing Minneapolis when Ole put his hand on Lena's knee. Giggling, Lena Said, "Ole, you can go farther if ya vant to"... so Ole drove to Duluth.