Small Update for Small Progress:
I started going through the electrical system on this fine machine, and noticed that some PO had previously done a half-ass polarity swap. They swapped the battery leads is all. I was suspicious this was the case, or the ammeter was wired backwards because the generator definitely...generates. My lights get brighter upon increasing engine RPM, but my ammeter read discharge. Anyway me, wanting to conform with the more modern vehicular world, left the negative ground oriented battery leads and swapped the ammeter wiring. For those concerned about the radio - this car was not equipped with one. On a wonderful note, the underdash harness is in incredible condition - great news for me. All insulation is still pliable, and doesn't fall apart.
Upon completion of my polarity swap, an unexpected thing happened. My headlights now work instantly with the turn of the knob (no fiddling), and so do my parking lights! I didn't mess with any of the engine bay/light harnesses to accomplish this. The only question I have is, can a polarity swap excite some circuits that may have been dead for a while? I don't know if that is possible. I'm not an electrical genius, but not completely incapable of performing electrical work, especially on a car this simple.
The car also starts easier, leading me to believe the coil may have been wired backwards (from stock) as well. Picture of functioning parking lights for the first time in who knows how long below: